Feeling anxious about your first session?

Are you feeling anxious about your first session?

It’s not uncommon for you to experience anxiety before a therapy session, especially if it’s the first time you are seeking help. This anxiety can be so overwhelming for some that many a times, they may decide to give up, even before they started and end up not seeking help for issues that are critical and need to be addressed.

When you are seeking therapy for the first time you could be anxious about

1. Stigma around mental illnesses and the therapy processes.
2. Not knowing what a therapy session entails and what to expect.
3. Assumptions about therapy. It could be that you will be forced to share information that you are not ready to share yet.
4. Fear of judgement from the therapist.
5. Revisiting painful memories or facing your worst experiences.
6. Negative experiences from therapy in the past.

It is important to acknowledge that you are indeed feeling anxious and to accept the fact that it’s a natural reaction to feel anxious in such a situation.

So, how do we address this?

You can approach your first session as an introductory session to the therapist and their process. Be open with the therapist, ask your questions about the therapy process and what to expect. The initial sessions are designed to build a therapeutic relationship and therefore, the client is not expected to share their innermost secrets, until the therapist has earned the trust of the client. The pace of the therapy is set by you, the client, based on your comfort. The confidential nature of therapy ensures that your privacy is respected and protected.

Is the therapist right for you?

A good therapist is also trained to be non-judgmental and is capable of separating personal values in their interaction with their clients in their professional capacity. A therapist provides a safe space where you can be vulnerable and address difficult experiences without the fear of being judged or dismissed. If, for some reason, the therapist is unable to do that, then it is their responsibility to let the client know about it and refer them to someone who is more qualified to address the client’s needs. If you feel you are not being supported by your therapist, you can always seek help from someone who is more attuned to your needs.

Anxiety about sessions when its not the first session.

There are times when clients feel anxious or develop anxiety past a few sessions, well after the therapeutic rapport has been established. There are a few reasons why this could happen:

1. Feeling of vulnerability and overwhelm as the client faces their trauma or when repressed emotions surface.
2. Not making enough progress or Inability to work on goals or homework set during sessions.
3. When confronted with their unhelpful thinking patterns or behavior traits.
4. When therapy is not going in the direction that they expected.

It is critical to share your anxiety with your therapist and allow them to explore why you are experiencing that anxiety. A good therapist welcomes feedback, and is ready to calibrate the pace of the session based on your comfort. They understand that thoughts, behaviors and personality traits are developed over many years, and it takes time to make a positive shift in mindset.

What can you do when you feel anxious?

If you do feel anxious here are some tips to calm yourself before a session:

1. Come and sit down for the session a bit ahead of time.
2. Use that time to practice some deep breathing or a short meditation.
3. Listening to music or singing aloud works wonders when you are nervous.
4. Reflect and gather your thoughts, jot down a few points you may want to bring up in the therapy session.
5. If you still feel anxious going into a therapy session, your therapist can create some space for you to calm down and make you feel comfortable. 

Consider therapy as a positive investment into your overall mental health and all the discomfort that comes with it, as growing pains in the process of becoming a better version of you.

Dhanya Sukumaran

Founder, Conversations & Care